Charisma - do you have it?
Charisma comes from the Greek root word, “Charis”, which means
“grace or gift”. The belief is that the gods breathe into you, a
special spirit. Charisma is an energy that can have a positive
effect, or a highly disruptive negative impact. It attracts
jealousy, and in extreme cases even loathing, from those who
don’t have it. If it’s resident as a spark, it can be fanned
into a flame. If it’s not there – well, it isn’t ever going to
be!
I was talking about charisma on radio one night. Saying pretty
much what I’ve said here. Someone called me on my mobile phone
literally the minute I left the studio, to ask, “Do you think I
have charisma?” I obeyed the Eastern dictum of “tell the truth
in the way that commits least injury”, and replied with a
non-answer, along the lines of, “Your patients love you – you
must have some charisma.” What went through my mind though, was
that if as an adult, you have to phone someone to ask if you
have charisma, the answer is pretty self-evident.
You may however, like my young goddaughter, be unaware that you
have charisma. And like her, be sincerely amazed at the degree
of competitiveness, antagonism or hostility your energy-shifting
presence causes in some circles. When people are deeply
conservative, intellectually or emotionally constrained and
restrained, they will frequently, if not always, interpret the
impact of your charisma as a negative, threatening, dislocating
force.
Good leaders all have charisma. It’s what attracts people to
them. “Spellbinding, enthralling, captivating, riveting”, are
words that are often used to describe a charismatic person.
Repelling people is the occasional opposite and negative effect
of charisma.
Charisma isn’t necessarily explicit, loud, vibrant or visible.
It may be a quiet, compelling force emanating from someone with
unobtrusive behaviour, speech or mannerisms. I’m reminded of a
worldwide ad agency group CEO, speaking to us years ago on a
training program. His was such a quiet but compelling, presence.
He spoke softly - sometimes so softly you almost had to strain
to hear him. But you absolutely couldn’t – and didn’t – want to
ignore him. Not because of his position, or power, but because
of his presence.
Archbishop emeritus Desmond Tutu has it. Nelson Mandela’s birth
name reflected in advance that he would have it – Rolihlala in
isiXhosa, means “he who stirs up trouble.” In this case of an
extremely positive kind! “Brother Leader”, the quixotic and
seriously daft Muammar Gaddafi, has it. Adolph Hitler had it in
evil bucket loads. Clinton has it, Tony Blair hasn’t. Maggie
Thatcher has it, John Major doesn’t. Golda Meir had it, Ariel
Sharon doesn’t. It’s something that leaps out of your television
set. Love ’em or hate ’em, you’ll notice when they have it.
Tim Sikyea, a native Canadian medicine man, described the gift
of healing being given to someone, like this: “When you are
given the gift of healing, the Wise Ones put a beetle in your
stomach. The beetle feeds on the pain and suffering of other
people. The day you stop feeding the beetle with the suffering
of others, it starts to consume you.”
What we often see in charismatic individuals is that they forget
the gift is in trust and for the benefit of others. Accompanying
personal magnetism, comes great responsibility. When people use
the force for self-adulation, the beetle starts its slow work.
The gift will drive them mad, or it will become a force for
evil. You will remember the medium, and miss the message.
If you’re aware that you have charisma, treat it like a
radioactive isotope that has been put in your trust - with
respect and awareness of its power to heal or harm – depending
on how it is applied.
Charisma doesn’t require good looks, height, a great voice or
some other distinctive feature. It is its own driving force –
independent of other attributes, which often have to function in
concert, to have an impact.
Many organizations and corporates pay lip service to respect for
diversity. But it’s almost a given, that the day someone with
charisma walks through the door, the organization will mount an
“immune system response”. It sets out to crush or kill the
“invading” foreign organism or bacterium, overwhelm it, and pull
it into line with “normal” cellular function. It takes deeply
insightful leaders to accept and nurture charismatic employees.
Most commonly the charismatic ones give up the fight against
mediocrity, and go off and do their own thing.
