Does It Matter What You Wear?
Of course it does! We want to be appropriately and comfortably
dressed so it isn’t distracting. How can you court your honey
when your shirt collar is choking you? your waistband is too
tight? How can you represent your client if the judge doesn’t
allow women lawyers to appear in court in pants? How can you
enjoy touring the Turtle Farm on Barbados when it’s 95 degrees
and you’ve got on polyester slacks? How can you work the Trade
Show when your feet are killing you?
CLOTHING AS NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION Clothing can show:
· How much money you have · How you spend your money · Your
values · How you take care of things · How organized you are ·
How creative you are · What profession or industry you’re in ·
Whether you’re a copy-cat or an original
ANALYZE THIS
It’s easy to do — clothing is all around us — so spend some
time analyzing. This is something you need to master.
It’s been said “dress for the position you next want,” so take a
look around your office. Where are the lines drawn. How do you
fit in?
Be mindful. Are you representing what you want to, and what you
intend to? I’m thinking of the mother at our children’s 8th
grade outdoor morning graduation ceremony in spangles, cleavage,
boa and dangly earrings. What look was she after, I wondered.
She had achieved the “appearing nightly” look.
FIND OUT WHAT’S APPROPRIATE
The emotionally intelligent person plans ahead. When planning to
travel on business, call a coach in the area you’re going to.
Male lawyers in San Antonio, TX USA wear suspenders, while when
my sister first started practicing law in D. C., judges did not
permit women lawyers to wear pantsuits in court.
In San Antonio, TX there isn’t much use for a coat rack. I had
no idea when I got to the Chicago Art Museum that I could check
my coat and boots. There were lockers. How nice! But neither was
I prepared for how hot they keep their buildings. People who
come to San Antonio are never prepared for how icy we keep our
buildings in the summer.
DOES IT REALLY MATTER?
Of course it does, because you want to be able to concentrate on
what’s really important.
You’ll probably have a sense of what areas of the country are
different, and in which areas dress matters more than in others.
I had no idea for instance what to wear for a professional trip
to Seattle, Washington (USA). Don’t laugh, but all I’d seen in
photos was lumber jackets and jeans. Of course YOU are not your
CLOTHES, but the more comfortable I am, the better I can do my
job, and the more I’ll enjoy myself. As my friend who didn’t
listen to me and took her bright floral patterned dresses to D.
C. found out, there are good ways to stand out, and there are
bad ways to stand out. In the room of 300 people all wearing
solid colors, she might as well have had a bone in her nose. She
found it hard to get it out of her mind. That can take the edge
off what you’re about! FORGETTING
Where I live it is 98 for a good part of the year, and then
plummets all the way to, oh maybe freezing once in a while. It
is said to snow once every ten years, but it’s been longer than
that since last it did. Therefore, I forget what “cold” means. I
know cold, I went to college in Minnesota but I forget the feel
of it. When I arrived in Duluth, MN in February and it was 40
below – honest degrees, not windchill – I was appalled. When you
check with that coach, don’t settle for “it’s cold up here” or
“it could be 40 below,” ask them “what’s should I bring?” and,
as I did before going to Russia, “please tell me what it feesl
like when it’s 70 degrees with 100 percent humidity and wind
blowing at X mph.”
If you’re female, ask that coach about jewelry. I was so
grateful to the mentor who told me when I attended my first XX
conference that the women in that profession in that town would
be “draped in jewelry, rings, bracelets, necklaces earrings, toe
rings, naval rings …” Of course I would like to know the
opposite, too. Why? Well, it’s not cool to sit down to a
business dinner in Seattle and ask for iced tea. If you know
what I mean. Oh, you haven’t done that? Let me tell you what
happens. Everyone’s head jerks toward you. Then they look away.
The waiter stammers and shifts from foot to foot. You realize
immediately there is no iced tea in this town. But the waiter
won’t let it go. “I’ll brew some tea,” he says, “and bring you a
glass of ice.” “Or just shoot me,” I’m thinking. Then he adds,
“Is that what iced tea is like?” Everyone is still looking at
the ceiling.
ASK THE COACH
Your answers are only as good as your questions. Here’s a good
question to ask that coach: “What will I wish I’d brought with
me that I won’t think of.” That will trigger the “tourist”
mindset in your resource person. Oh the things I’ve wished I’d
brought. ·A well broken in pair of sandals for my Caribbean
cruise ·A bathing suit for my December trip to Chicago. Of
course the hotel had a hot tub. They all do. ·A pair of
comfortable heels each time I’ve given a presentation. Why do I
fool myself? ·Slacks with elastic waistline for cruises
·Something Tencel for long trips ·The black Pashmina shawl that
works with everything. Why do I leave it in the back of my
closet? ·Something for the rain. It rains when you go somewhere
else. You can go to the dollar store and buy what amounts to
disposable ponchos and head covers. (Great for touring Russia in
the summer or Seattle nearly any time). ·Something really cute
for vacations. You think you want to go funky, but then you see
someone in a smashing linen matching outfit, and there you are,
buying something cute in the hotel store with a price tag that
isn’t cute at all. ·An evening bag. With an evening bag you can
get by with that same black Tencel skirt … you know what I mean.
·Jeans. Dry cleaned and starched. ·Sensible shoes. Oh was I mad
when they wouldn’t let me rent a motorbike on Grand Cayman with
my thong sandals, and the heels back in my room wouldn’t have
made the cut either. ·That thing that’s hanging on the back of
your chair if you’re in an office right now. You know what I
mean. Bring it along for when you get cold which could be
anywhere, any time. Find out what you need to know and master
the fundamentals so you don’t have to think about what you’ve
got on!
